I've come to a new resolution recently that when it comes to things I cant control, I have the option to do one of two things: Complain about it, or decide that (after a good cry) finding things to be thankful for is a better option. Tonight was one of those moments. I heard in Sunday school class today that complaining about your situation in life is not only unproductive, but it doesn't allow us to recognize what the situation is: God's hand in our life. Although we like to only recognize the blessings we are given, which is wonderful to continuously notice, we need to see that when we have trials or things generally just not going our way, its not by chance. God is putting us in this situation for a reason that only he may know, but all things work together for our good (Romans 8:28), as he says.
So although I would really like to have what I want right now, knowing I'm not going to get it, I can complain about it, or I can strive to see an eternal perspective and find the blessings in knowing God's hand is constantly in my life, and this too is for my good. God knows who we are, what we need, at every moment, and loves us so incredibly much as to put us through trials that will test us and e nurture us to grow. I hope I can always remember that, its so hard sometimes when I'm so disappointed in knowing something I want very much is not going to be mine, or at least not for a really long while.
I love my Savior and I am grateful for all he has endured for me. I'm excited and nervous, and afraid for what my future might bring. Keeping that eternal perspective helps to lessen the fear though. Anything God puts in my path, even though I may feel like it could break me, is possible to overcome or do with God in my life. I hope you find the opportunity to see God's hand in your life too, and know his love for you is unending, without condition, without regard, and greater than your human scope can fathom. I hope someday to be able to fully understand that kind of love.
Today I was able to do splits almost all day with the sister missionaries. I'm grateful for the opportunities to see my own weaknesses and strengths through days like this. Sister Sammartano said that she thought my teaching was good enough that if she didn't know better she would have assumed I was a return missionary. I believe that is a real compliment: Being able to help bring the spirit and sincerely show God's love. I'm not exactly sure how I developed this trait (except maybe the several Mission Prep classes a week I attended in the many, many months I patiently waited for a call), but teaching the little things or complexities of God's gospel that I actually do understand, is something that sincerely brings me joy. I hope I am able to fulfill more opportunities like these. Sometimes I wish I could still go on a mission, but I know my time has passed for that, and so now I am just trying to find ways to serve and teach, as a missionary would, in my own life. I hope I can fulfill all these opportunities to the best of my potential. I love God and its times like these that reveal to me an obvious satisfaction in living His Gospel.
<3 for now and always.... Liz